Saturday, August 21, 2010

Resuscitated Not Reborn

I have freedom papers.
I have the option to go back to university, and escape this humdrum town.  Am I gonna take it...

Ehh.

The walking contradiction shrugs her shoulders.  I don't know.  I don't think I'll like uni; I went once, and the people were so dry I wanted to kill myself.  If my positivity was an ailing flower I believe that experience acted as weed killer and took me out.

Suddenly I'm put in the position of having one month and less to get my shit together, and get the hell out.  No money, no time.  But I have to go, or there will be none of me left.  There's barely anything to salvage now.

How do you go from recluse to social butterfly?  How do you go from failure to success?  How do you make a fake smile real?

Don't ask me.

I don't know how to discipline myself anymore.  I'm so lazy it's embarrassing.  I have so much baggage I need a horse and carriage, and I've been quiet far too long.  It's time to put this conflict to rest.  It's time to go, it's time to run.

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