The Unspoken Language

I feel myself drifting away from everyone.  Restlessly, I move from relationship and friendship, unsatisfied and disappointed.  Trying to hold down the fort at university.  Don't ask about the job.  Can't write, no time.  Wonder if anything has changed.

I'm startled to realize that at this point in my life, I have no time for my own drama.  There's only time for work and sleep, and I barely fit either in.  Ostracised, I smile gamely, and come home, to a place I hate.  Trapped really.  My opinion pushes people away.  I'm too far in to stop now.  Where did real friends go?  Where are real people?  

I'm still trying.  What, a fighter?  Unfazed.  There's always a way.  The way I want, needs money.  Soon, I pray.  The truth is so close, I can feel it, like searching for an elusive light switch in the heavy darkness.  And when it all clicks into place, I swear-

I'll be that girl again.