Thursday, June 30, 2011

Stop Living In Regret, Baby It's Not Over Yet

Beyonce has a song on her newest album '4' that I can't deny, just speaks to me.  'Schoolin Life' has a strong 80s influence, that makes me yearn for the past, whilst tentatively hoping for the future.

I don't know.  When I was growing up I had the idea that if you wanted something, and you did the necessary to get it, you would have it.  That doesn't seem to be the case now.  Bad girls get the good guys, incompetent people get the decent jobs via connections, and truth as well as justice in our world remains elusive.

I guess I've spent too much time contemplating my past, and the things that I wish I could change (but can't) that I now struggle to clearly see my future, or what I really want from it.   

But anyway, I have started making changes.  Recently I've been trying to draw myself out of my heavy-going-nowhere novel, and decided to try my hand at a few short stories.  However, I've found it difficult to remember everything that I used to know to create a good story such as strong characters, fast pace, dialogue, imagery, senses etc.  I sat staring at my blank word document and  remembered one of my favourite English teachers reiterating the notion that 

"If You Don't Read, You Can't Write."

With my laptop's steadily deteriorating capabilities in functioning, my continued unemployment and now justified boredom, I've reverted to reading intensely.  I brought a few books from home back with me and started with one of my favourite books: Sabriel, by Garth Nix which is a dark fantasy novel about a girl who possesses the ability to put the dead to rest.  I'm currently half way through Stephen King's Skeleton Crew, a collection of horror stories, and so far I'm loving it.  I'm loving feeling my own imagination come to life, rather than being force fed via videos and TV.

Think the next books I'm going to go for are a few classics, and I just bought Homer's Odyssey.  Might also reread the complete Chronicles of Narnia by Lewis, if there is time during my studies.  I'm going to throw myself into creativity this summer, by studying, reading and writing.  It feels like for the past few years all that I've been doing is faffing about.  But now it seems that playtime is officially over.

It feels like it's time to be someone.



  1. Anywho I cannot agree more with your quote. I notice that everytime I immerse myself into reading my writing is substantially better. Can't wait to read your first short story.


    I love reading your blog. It always make me feel a little better knowing someone out there is going through a similar situation as I.

  2. I totally agree with you on all points! And I love Schoolin' Life. It is my anthem! In fact, its my blog's theme song too lol.

    I wish you the best with your writing and can't wait to read more from you. I enjoy reading your blog <3


  3. @Shirley T.
    Thanks :) I've noticed the internet is such a distraction that I'm not completing as many productive tasks as I could be! Here's to reading and getting somewhere in life :p X

    @Miss Dre
    Thanks hun, and yeh I've had this song on repeat on my ipod, it made me download 80s songs I'd forgotten about and listened to as a kid :) X

  4. Fabulous song, thanks for sharing. :)

    The Cat Hag

  5. @The Cat Hag
    No probs, it's one of my fave songs right now :) X

  6. It feels like it's time to be someone. - But who? I feel like I wanna do a million things at once and end up doing nothing. As far as reading goes, I do that too, I mix genres so I don't get bored. Everything from self-help to dystopian novels.

  7. @Adrienne
    I want to be someone who has a life that works, rather than this anti-life lol. I've spent so long wanting to do several things with my life too! I've just realized that I'll only get somewhere by focusing on two, or three tops at a time X

  8. I sooo love this post and I feel exactly what you're saying!!!It's hard for me to concentrate on one thing, unemployment sucks. I know, I can relate. Sounds like you have a plan though!

    Sincerely your new follower,

    -Nicole Alicia

  9. This is a brilliant post, you write really well! I agree with you, it is a hard world out there! I adore your blog and will definitly be back to read more of your posts. I wish you lots of luck with it!

    All the best,

  10. @Nicole Alicia
    Thank you! lol I'm not so sure about the plan, but I certainly am trying to hang in there :) X

    Thanks so much :) I will be checking your blog out too, you have some handy tips there :p X

  11. I love this post so much I could agree more with it! I defo have been feeling a bit like this recently, a bit unsure of what it is im really doing. Your right, it is time to just figure it all out and stop just faffing about.
    It takes a while but you will get there! Good luck :) xo


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