Sunday, June 05, 2011

The Return

"Don't want to go back to that place, but don't have no choice, no way."
Pink, Family Portrait.

So I'm going back to the humdrum countryside.

NOOOOOO.

Well, for a few days.  I have to take this slow.  Very slow.
To be truthful, I'm petrified.  I feel ill remembering that place, anytime I dream about back there it is a nightmare. A place of judgement, where everyone knows your business, before you do, and ugly memories.  I lost a large part of myself there.  It was also a place where I had to cut off a lot of friends, who weren't real friends to me, and just wanted to use me, as if life was some big popularity show.

Despite my fear, I have to overcome this phobia.  I can go where I want, regardless of people's feelings towards me.  And I have things to retrieve from my room, I miss my family, and some of my lingering friends.  And I need a break from this place.  

Wish me luck.
And God watch over me.
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