Dreams Deferred

This post was going to be titled, Regret.  However I got some news Saturday, and suddenly feel so hopeful, like I'm on the right track.

I couldn't get enough money together to enrol on the Creative Writing course.  I prepared to throw away my dreams of having some form of qualification in my key avocation.  I even cried about it in bitter despair, thinking that that was it, and my current degree was finally going to take me away from who I really am.  I wrote to the course leader, expressing my worries, and recently received an email stating that I could defer my place on the course till next year.

Hello elation :)

I am back at uni now.  I had so many fines to pay what with moving in to my new accommodation and paying my resit fees that I had to beg for money from my family, and am only paying back my debts now, thanks to a hefty student loan.  I work three days a week, and although it doesn't sound like a lot, it leaves me exhausted, (although still thankful, there's nothing good about being broke.)  Quite a few of my friends from last year dropped out, or left uni, so this year may be a little bit lonely, although I plan on socialising a lot more than I did last year.

I'm noticing that it's easier to maintain a positive attitude, when positive things are occurring during your life.  I hate when things are at their worst, and you're told to cheer up.  Keep on trying, is fair enough.  But cheer up?  I see no point in grinning like an idiot, when life is crumbling around me.

But with perseverance, emerges hope.  Hope is carried on the back of destiny it seems.  First semester doesn't start till next week, so I have a little bit of time before throwing myself back into the storm. I'm mostly focusing on sorting out my mess of a new bedroom (and getting accustomed to the supposed luxury of a double bed).  Plus there have been a few more changes in my life that I'll blog about, but guess that can wait till another post.  

I'm going to get working on some short stories tonight too.  There's no time to waste.  There's going to be some changes around here :)