Something happened to me this year.
It was neither positive nor negative.
I fell, and realized that I was so broken, that I couldn't break.
Does that make sense? I wouldn't call this enlightenment. But I felt that I had been buried in a scarlet vacuum. And suddenly I was set free.
I felt like I could see through and above anything. Everything else seemed and became trivial. Love. Friendship. Even happiness.
There's something else out there.
I lost my fear.
That to me seems incredible. I'm sure sometime later I'll write down here that I'm nervous about exam results, job interviews, or other life choices, but at the moment it's all gone. A stoic resilience became unchained with me, and I became fearless. Whatever could have happened has already happened. I watched my own repeated mistakes so many times, I became bored and switched off.
I awoke to the reality of destiny.
I see through fear now. You can only do what you can. Fear will only ever cripple action. I don't fear failure; it wasn't enough to break me. Neither was heartbreak, abandonment, or isolation.
Something is supposed to happen. Something amazing.
I see that now that I am free.
I like this post. I'm always stressing about life but last year I kind of just let go of that stress and just thought you know, my life is already going to happen as it happens, stressing wont change nor help! Amazing things still can happen I believe!
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i think this post is really inspiring and purely amazing. i am glad you found that peace and confidence and that you you've reached this state. Things are only going to be awesome in this new spirit.
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@ That Girl Saadiya, I agree, I was getting so stressed that I couldn't even function properly. Hopefully things will work out in this calmer state :) Xx
ReplyDelete@lil miss Sauniya, thank you hun, I hope that this state and sense of calm doesn't leave me :) Xx